Geoff Leppard: A new dawn rises

After taking the winter off to hibernate in a small box in the loft, Geoff has awoken, blinking at the bright snow covered landscape. As our eyes adjust, we realise that Nigel can’t be awoken from his trance-like state (that appears to be the result of an attempt to smoke his own foot) and Tommo is gone, presumably eaten by one of us to stave off the hibernation munchies. A note left next to our box (scrawled in blue crayon) says “you’re playing the Lotus Festival again”. We spot someone taking pictures of us, trying to capture this rare event – it’s Jim, our official photographer. We ask him “can you play bass?” He says “I don’t know, probably.” “Good enough” we reply, before quickly tying and gagging him before he can escape.

Geoff has stirred, and he’s hungry…